Fee advise please update!!!

[lavendergirl]

WARNING TO OTHER CHILDMINDERS

As I wrote in a previous thread,I have been having problems with a parent paying her invoice because she 'felt uncomfortable'about paying me for the time her son was in nursery,I explained to her that minders still get paid if we are dropping off and collecting and her son is taking up one of my spaces and I would find it hard to fill the space for a couple of hrs per afternoon.She asked if we could talk about it which I agreed to as I didn't want tension buit everytime I asked for an appointment to be made she kept putting it off,she agreed to pay me up until 18th Jan which was the day her child starts nursery,well on Monday I told her we need an appointment to chat this week as it needed to be sorted out now,she said she could do weds(yesterday).
In the mean time I heard through the minding grapevine that she was looking for another minder but as she was told we all charge for the time they are in nursery.
We had the meeting yesterday and without going into all the detail she tried to turn it onto me saying I had screwed her and should have told her this at the beginning,well I tried to talk to her reasonably but she wasn't going to listen and the conversation from her included her using language to me which I thought was totally unexceptable and also in front of the children.
She told me her options were to use 2 childminders to care for her children or she could get a place in a day nursery for them,I told her it was up to her what to do(she pulled her child out of day nursery before she came to me because she didn't like them and wanted her son in a home environment) but was she giving me notice as of then and she said yes,so I reminded her she still has to pay me for the month.She left after I told her I would not back down and told me to F-off, again in front of the children!!!

Now I am not an unreasonable person and am willing to listen to the other persons point of view but she kept putting me off and when I found out she had been looking for another minder I felt betrayed and felt I was now in a position that I could no longer be reasonable and was right in what I was asking for.

I wake this morning to find a letter of termination of contract through my door,explaining again how it was my fault(but not actually saying it was my fault) but no money,so she will be getting a reply from me with the final invoice included.

So can I just say please all you minders,make it very clear what you want,if you read the back of the contracts it says for playgroup hours the minder needs to be paid for but doesnt mention nursery,we know it means nursery as they are virtually the same but obviously when money is involved everything needs to be very,very clear.I am now putting this information in the welcome pack I show parents,I will never be caught like this again.

Lavendergirl

[Pauline]

Well done for standing up to her!

You did the right thing in sticking to your guns and not letting her grind you down, she showed her true colours with the abuse and bad language so perhaps you are well rid of her. It's disgraceful to behave like that at any time, but in front of children is unforgivable.

You should now make sure you get your termination money. If that is in the contract then you can get help through NCMA or Citizen's Advice. It probably won't have to go that far if she sees that you mean it, and a letter from someone official would probably be enough to make her pay up before it got to court.

It's good advice to make sure everything is covered in your contract, thanks for letting everyone know and sharing your experience.

Hope everything goes alright for you.

[angeldelight]

You sound like you handled this parent perfectly what a cheek some people have no morals and just do not understand just how much us childminders do to actually accommodate them. I agree with Pauline very well done for standing up to her.

You are right to point out about making sure about your contracts etc

It is not just about nursery's it is about everything , these days some people will try to twist everything so you need to make it very clear in every single way just what you mean and what you expect and make sure it is all in your contract

I remember when I started 16 years ago people just did not seem to be like this and we never had Ofsted or NCMA or contracts like these days but despite not having any of that I never had to make much clear parents were so lovely I never had any problems.
I think that things have changed a lot in the last 5 years or so and despite all the paper work that goes with childminding you still get parents like the one you have had to deal with.
It never fails to amaze me how much parents will try to get out of paying a childminder , they get so much help with working tax credits too

Despite everything though it is the good parents that keep us all going and there are a lot of them they are the ones that make it all seem worth while.

Keep us posted on any new developments I can not see her liking her final invoice
Remember you are not alone and we all understand though and are here to support you

Good luck lavendergirl

Angel
xx

[Pauline]

angeldelight said:

an and what you expect and make sure it is all in your contract

Despite everything though it is the good parents that keep us all going and there are a lot of them they are the ones that make it all seem worth while.

Yes you are right I can count on the fingers of one hand all the 'not so nice' parents and during the 22 years I've been minding there have been a lot of parents I can tell you!!

The lovely ones far outweigh the others, I am still very good friends with many of my ex-parents, we've shared the good times and the bad times in each others lives and it makes it all worthwhile.

So, let's say a big thank you to all the lovely parents!

[lavendergirl]

Well following on from my previous posting,I wrote her a letter explaining things from my point of view and even saying I was sorry she felt bad about things,I included her final invoice too and said if nothing came I would be taking things further to get my money,it has now been 4 wks and still nothing.

2 weeks ago I found out from someone who works in the nursery her boys used to go to(the one she took them out of to be with me due to lack of care!!!!!!) that she also owes £1600 to them and that they have started proceedings against her to get their money,so this weekend I am drafting a letter telling her she has another 7 days to give me my money or I will be definately taking it further.I am more determined to now I know this seems to be a regular thing of taking them away from places once there is a problem with payment.

Now this is where I need to here other peoples views........I know which day nursery she has taken her boys to and am thinking of phoning them and just explaining what I know about her history of paying -on one hand I feel I should do but on the other hand I feel like a tell tale if I do.

What do you all think??

What would you do??

Lavendergirl

[heldraincloud]

Hi

Hope you get this sorted, personally I would let them know, shes done this twice now xxxx

[angeldelight]

Sorry that you still have not received your money, poor you !!

If she owes that sort of money to the nursery then I think you should seek advice immediately

Sounds to me like she has got herself into a lot of childcare debt and just trying to run away from it

I do not think I would call the nursery
I can understand that you want to warn them but I am not sure if it is a good idea to call
What would you do if any of the information you have been given was not true, then it could or would look like you was trying to cause trouble because she owes you money. It could look like sour grapes or even worse slander !!

If I were you I would leave everyone else to their business and concentrate on yours

Your main aim here is to get what you have worked hard for that is what I would be fighting for

Did you contact NCMA what did they say
If you have not contacted them then I think you should

Keep us updated

Good luck I hope you get it sorted out

Angel xx

[Pauline]

I think Angel is right you could be accused of slander if you contact the nursery, what you know so far could be claimed as hear-say rather than fact, best to leave them to sort their own problems if they arise.

I would get straight on to getting a small claims court proceedings going to try and get your money, get in touch with whoever you are insured with and ask their advice or go the the citizens advice bureau.

Don't leave it any longer, if the rumours are true then you want to be first in the queue for her money!

Good luck

[debratina]

hi
i would do want Angel and Pauline have advised.
if you phone the nursery you are in breach of confidentiality.
which in turn could led to a complaint to ofsted.
Debra