picking up children

[haribo]

hi everyone ive just read about visiters books i havent got one are they needed? also how do you get parents to leave when they come for the kids?? i always have a quick chat about the child and anything they need to know but i have one who sits down and sometimes even starts to tell me about HIS day!this is my last pick up at 6 so usually no other mindees around but by then im tired and have to see to my ownfamily .itry to be polite but my patience is wearing thin ! any ideas anyone?x

[manjay]

Not had this one yet but I know it has been mentioned on here before. Is it possible to have the child ready at the door for when he arrives so you can just do a quick handover? I am really going to try to do this as a) I don't want them trailing through my house and b) I too want a quick handover so I can get on with looking after the other children or my family

Amanda xx

[tasha]

I've had this...as already suggested have them in their coat & shoes etc & hand over at the door! Failing that start charging them for the extra time...both work...I know from experience!
Tasha

[lorri]

Do you do a newsletter? If so, could you slip it into that somehow as a general note or something so it's not directed at one person but he'd get the idea?

Or, if he comes in could you get the hoover out and start doing housework or something so he gets the hint to leave? Ha ha!

Lorri x

[haribo]

thanks for replies . lol lorri i do nearly do that i potter round tidying up and stuff ha ha .i think some people are just insensitive and think weve got nothing better to do ! (chance would be afine thing)anyway hes just gone not too bad today think i gave off dont talk to me vibes!x

[custardcream]

I have this with one parent she has been known to stay an hour, I now put my coat on and say "i am very sorry but i have to be somewhere", very nicely of course.

[lisaurry]

Hi there,

Very frustrating isn't it?? I have one also, but she doesn't sit down, she just stands chatting to the kids, and I stand behind like a spare part! What I didn't realise, is there is a mirror in the hallway, and she could see me pulling faces the one day!!! ha ha

I just am quite blunt now, put me coat on and say I've gotta go. I also get the kids ready, coats/shoes etc and by the door as soon as I see her car.

Lisa x

[sarahnev707]

i was late for a meeting the other night - and I mean half an hour late and starting to panic! One set of parents come in, pick up both children and go pretty quickly. Another, a father, comes in, sits down with his daughter on his lap and starts reading her schoolbook with her!!! I was horrified!

I made 'got to go' noises, coat and shoes on and he said 'we won't be long, she just wants to read this'

He's fairly new so I'll give him the benefit of the doubt this time, but she'll be ready by the door in future

Sarahx

[haribo]

you know, i think it must be mostly the dads who do thi and i think they re going slow on purpose cos the mums arent in yet and they dont want to get in and start again like mums do lol women just want to get on with what needs doing! oops hope i havent offended any dads now just in my experience women are a bit better at "reading"the situationx

[Pauline]

I'd try saying something like "anyway, it's really lovely chatting with you but I'm afraid I must get on as I need to get dinner done/washing done/cleaning done" (delete as applicable )

Then get up and make for the door, get their coats and start helping them on.

Hopefully they will get the message

[angeldelight]

I used to have this all the time with parents

The last few years I have made it clear before they sign contract that it is quick drop off and quick collection because I have other children to care for and can not leave them

So when the drop off it is fairly quick
Pick up is slightly longer just small talk about the day

No parent comes into my house

They do if they need to chat with me or if it is pouring down with rain

But still quick and I do not take them into the lounge at all

Good luck I hope you sort this out

Angel xx

[miffy]

This is a difficult one to get right without offending but tasha is right - if you charge for the extra time it will stop quickly but I'd use that as a last resort.

Having the child ready to go and saying that you are going out/ need to get on or whatever is a bit gentler to start with

Some parents though don't take the hint and then you've no choice but to be blunt. Let's hope this parent takes the hint

Good luck

Miffy

[vik3000]

custardcream said:

I have this with one parent she has been known to stay an hour, I now put my coat on and say "i am very sorry but i have to be somewhere", very nicely of course.

oh wow only an hour!!! You are soooooo lucky, mindee mum has been known to stay nearly 2and half hours!! We have managed to get it down to an hour now.

We generally have a quick chat and then its the usual in getting the kids out the door - the youngest normally starts acting it, going to hide (in unreachable places), takes coats/shoes/clothes of, kicks up a mega fuss, needs the toilet - if Mum doesn;t treat her the way she wants, Mum generally "reasons" with her instead of grabbing and going and her eldest normally won;t get of the playstation.

I have made sure the kids are standing ready with coats, shoes bags etc, and have made firm statements -"can't stop long tonight got to be......". I have missed an appointment, was late getting sons to swim classes. I have put it the newsletters. To no avail. I have even point blank said I don;t mind having a chat on a Friday evening but during other days I really do need to be getting on with housework, hubs tea, going to xxx.

I really enjoy Mums company and we have some great nights out but at times my neighbour has deliberately rung me or come round to ask me to go and help her etc to "rescue me" (bless the neighbour).

Like I say we have scaled it down to approx 1 hour or so now!

;D

[raggydolls]

makes me glad im in an upstairs flat. i will take the child down with me to answer the door then not let them in, lol

[donnahay0]

Sorry to add to this so late.

I am having this problem with a mum who is between jobs (and looks like she will be for a while). We get on really well and always asks for advise regarding her child and she never used to stay for long when she was working. (Sometimes I wonder why she doesn't keep the child at home with her for a couple of extra hours here and there during the week, he's a lovely boy and not at all difficult).

However, since being at home all day she has taken to dropping by to collect her child earlier than normal (by about half an hour) but stopping to chat and ends up either leaving on time or even later.

As you will all agree this is a difficult time of day. I have a baby to feed, nappy change and pack his stuff together. Other afterschooler is in the house and the children tend to get very noisy and run riot when mum arrives, own children wanting to speak to me & other mums are arriving and it gets very busy.

Trouble is I just can't find it in my nature to be rude and I feel that as she has paid up until home time I can't tell her to go. She also chats for ages in the morning when she drops off and I have breakfasts and school run to organise. I usually have a cup of tea at this time and feel awful that I don't offer her one. I haven't yet as this would be a really dodgy path to go down.

Sorry just having a moan....

[lorri]

Bless her! She's probably really lost without a job, she probably still brings him to you while she's at home so she can come and see you!

Doesn't help you though does it!

I'd be the same as you and not have the heart to mention it! I've got no advice because I'd be stuck on what to do too!

Lorri x

[helen1980]

Maybe it would be an idea to do a policy (yep another one) about picking up and use excuses like - some children get upset because they don't want to go, want to carry on playing, health and safety if you have a narrow hallway etc

Just a thought

xx

[rubybubbles]

lisaurry said:

Hi there,

Very frustrating isn't it?? I have one also, but she doesn't sit down, she just stands chatting to the kids, and I stand behind like a spare part! What I didn't realise, is there is a mirror in the hallway, and she could see me pulling faces the one day!!! ha haI just am quite blunt now, put me coat on and say I've gotta go. I also get the kids ready, coats/shoes etc and by the door as soon as I see her car.

Lisa x

That so funny about making faces sorry ;D ;D

[rubybubbles]

Best way is to have all toys put away, and getting shoes on already!!

Mind you I was all ready last night for 5pm then mum didn't pick up until 5.15pm!! (this is our contract but she's always here at 5pm lol at me)